Is It Done?

Today's Work - Untitled Portrait in Yellows

Palette
Windsor and Newton: Vermilion Hue, Cadmium Yellow Light, Indian Yellow, Raw Umber, Lamp Black, Flake White No. 1
Graham: Alizarin Crimson, Ultramarine Blue
Old Holland: Titanium White

I have been working on this painting for the better part of a year and a half. Why has it taken me so long? When will it be done?

Part of it is the length of time between sittings. I often paint for three hours, set it aside for three months, and paint for an hour more.

Part of it is the transformation I have undergone in how I paint in the last two years. In dozens of smaller paintings, I have become a far better painter. So my standards have changed. And even now, as I finally think I am capable enough to handle a likeness of a relative, I find myself making adjustments. I want it to be her, not resemble her.

Part of it is the size. It is 36" by 24" and I don't want to know the number of tubes of paint it has on it. I will faint.

Now I think it might be done. But my question is this: why don't I know for sure? I have smaller paintings that I look at and say, "Yes, that is complete." Why can't I do that now?

Perhaps it's because I so much want this painting to be perfect that I will always be nitpicking it to death. And that's exactly what I will get if I continue down this road: death.

So I am going to let it sit, get fresh eyes, put a coat of retouch varnish on it and most likely call it done.

Most likely.